6 Myths About Dark Retreats & The Truth About Darkness Experiences

Myth 1: A Dark Retreat Means Being in a Bare, Uncomfortable Room

When people hear the term "dark retreat," they often give me a confused look, conjure up images of a stark, uninviting space that resembles a hovel, devoid of any comforts or amenities. This misconception can deter many from exploring the profound benefits that come from this transformative experience.

In reality, most darkness retreats are designed to be a comfortable sanctuary for the mind, body, and soul, providing a gentle, safe, and secure environment that encourages deep introspection and healing. Most rooms are clean and cozy, featuring a nice bed, bathroom, and ample space for a yoga mat, meditation aids, and nutritious meals delivered to your room daily.

Dark Retreats are safe rooms and gentle spaces for your nervous system to slow down, soften, and settle into stillness for a healing and transformative experience.

Myth 2: You’re Stuck In A Dark Room With No Support

The Truth: A well-held dark retreat is guided with compassion, safety, and presence, to name a few. Contrary to some beliefs out there, you are not “thrown into darkness” to fend for yourself.

Some dark retreats don't offer a "held" experience. When looking for a dark retreat, look for retreats that have practiced, trauma-informed, skilled, and intuitive facilitators who hold space with daily check-ins behind a door, provide meals, and are available if there is any type of emergency.

Some Dark Retreats, like the one's I am collaborating on, incorporate somatic, trauma-based therapy to support people before they go into the dark so they feel safe and empowered to engage in their transformative experience and the therapist fully also provides integration work after the dark retreat.

Myth 3: A Dark Retreat Is Like a Psychedelic Trip

Truth: While some people experience visionary moments, that’s not the goal of a dark retreat.

Dark retreats are not designed as a substitute for psychedelics or hallucinogens. What can happen in prolonged darkness is a gradual opening of perception — sometimes visual or dreamlike experiences as the mind and senses recalibrate in the dark. A dark container allows the hamster wheel to stop and for one to see all parts of themselves, see meaning, re-evaluate what they value and what is essential and true for oneself and their life.

But the essence of the practice is embodied presence, rest, stillness, healing, not chasing visions, and not trying to achieve some kind of peak experience. Someone may have this, but it isn't the point. Each person's response to the dark is totally unique.

Myth 4: Once The Lights Are Off, They Stay Off Until You Have Completed Your Time

Truth: A safe and secure darkness retreat will make sure you have access to electrical candles and lights so you can titrate your experience in the dark, not override it.

The nervous system's primary function is to adapt to the environment it's in. Most of us have a nervous system that has never experienced being in total darkness for 3+ days with our eyes open. As the nervous system begins to adapt to the dark, it can be a bumpy ride for some and a smooth ride for others.

Dark retreats are not an endurance test to see how many days a person can stand being in darkness. Find a dark facilitator who explains what a grey retreat it is. It's wise to learn how much time you spend in the dark and how much light you may need to stay grounded in your body instead of gritting your teeth and bearing through it.

As we practice and grow more comfortable with stillness and the unknown, we become better able to be with whatever arises in the dark: intense emotions, disorientation, moments of isolation, or unprocessed adverse memories.

This practice is about learning to titrate your experience—to gently expand your window of tolerance while staying connected to your body. When approached with mindfulness and softness, these experiences can become profoundly healing.

Myth 5: Only Monks or Hardcore Meditators Can Do A Dark Retreat

Truth: Anyone seeking deep rest, clarity, or healing can benefit.

Dark retreats do have their roots in ancient Tibetan Buddhist and Taoist traditions, where monks and dedicated practitioners used extended darkness as a path to awaken deeper layers of consciousness and dissolve attachments.

The modern evolution of this practice is far more inclusive. Today, dark retreats are being offered through a modern, secular, trauma-informed lens—offered to people of all ages, backgrounds, and stages of development.

You don’t need years of meditation training or spiritual discipline to enter the dark. What’s required is a curious, open and playful mindset, and the capacity to listen deeply to what arises within your internal world when all external stimulation falls away.

Whether you’re a creative seeking renewal, someone navigating transition or burnout, or simply longing for rest and stillness in an overstimulated world, the dark offers a profoundly equalizing space.

Myth 6:

Dark Retreats Are a Place to Have a Near-Death Experience

Truth: A dark retreat is not designed to induce a near-death experience. Rather, it offers a deeply healing and transformative container where each individual has a unique journey that unfolds in its own way. While some people report moments of ego dissolution or altered perception, this is not the same as a literal near-death experience.

In darkness, layers of identity often begin to soften or dissolve. As this happens, one’s perception of self, others, and the world can shift dramatically, leading to expanded awareness and a profound sense of connection. Some describe this as entering a non-dual or “ego-death” state—an experience of unity beyond the usual boundaries of the mind.

However, it’s a misconception to believe that someone can enter a dark retreat with the goal of inducing a near-death experience. Approaching the dark with that kind of agenda can actually interfere with the natural unfolding of the process. True transformation arises from presence, not from force. As with any deep spiritual or psychological practice, having discernment is essential.